In response to Tara's essay

Tara's essay followed an interesting topic that I believe every student enjoyed reading about: good girls falling for the bad boy. Her essay followed a great structure which began by introducing each of the three types of love that she experienced and a story for each type of love. By the end of the essay, these three themes of love find it's way back into the conclusion to show the deeper meaning of the inclusion of each love.

Response to Victorias collage

Victoria's collage was very structured and included many aspects of a great collage. The essay had many substantial details and information which allowed for the readers to really embed themselves into the story and to understand her from her pont of view. At first, she followed all of her friends and family in making most of her life decisions such as what college, sorority etc. but as the essay progresses she learns to follow her own instincts and her own steps rather than other people's footsteps, which may be dangerous which is portrayed in this picture, where a young girl watches her friend attempt to walk on the thin wooden fence. The young girl watches and is contemplating whether or not to follow in these footsteps, which may result in unwanted conclusions.

Response to Sarah's The evolution of Conformity

Sarah did not talk about herself as much as she did of her cousin and her friend Lucy. I enjoyed the theme of Sarah's essay which explores different perspectives of people not following the usual precedents that society enforces upon people. I would like for her to include a little more of herself, but I also wonder why she didnt. Is it because she is ashamed of not following the norm, so she focuses in on other people who haven't? Maybe it is just how she planned for the structure of her essay to be. This picture shows a girl covering her face, but still showing her eye which means that although she is hiding most of herself, she is still able to see while hiding as well.

Response to Justins Puzzles and PIeces

Justins essay was very well written because he followed a nice structure which he followed up on to provide concrete information and examples in each body paragraph. He was able to allow readers to see from his point of view because he was not afraid to talk about his personal problems, even including illegal substances. I chose this picture of this statement on a T-shirt because often times, life is not the fairest for the middle child, as is in Justin's case. However, Justin has the ability to take this disadvantage and make it an advantage which is one thing I really like about this piece. He was able to substantially and efficiently show readers his capabilities.

Response to Carlies Maturities Priorities

I chose to use a picture of a classroom for this response to Carlies "Maturities Priorities." Why? Because this is one of very few things in almost every child's life from the first day of school all the way until the last day of school, from pre-kindergarten up until graduate school. This setting, the classroom, is a place that every kid spends almost half of each day of their lives in. This is where every person makes friends, learns new lessons and expands his/her knowledge every day. I enjoyed reading Carlies essay a lot because of her writing style and the tense which she wrote her essay in.

Response to Sydneys Good Girl Gone Godless

I really love the title of Sydneys piece here. In just these four words of the title, I was able to deduce the essay to a very specific topic, but it wasn't too much that the entire story was revealed either. This is what makes a good title to a story, in my opinion. I began reading the essay expecting to learn of Sydney's religious past and her connection to it, prior to her discussion and extraction of her experiment. I believe that she could have included more to emphasize her position in a religious setting, due to the fact that nobody in the world, when it comes to religion, is ever on the same page exactly. Everybody is different and I would like to see Sydney reveal some more reflection to allow readers to understand her and to connect to her essay more easily. She extracted her experiment in this essay by listing out each day what she did, how she did it, and what she was feeling, all without the guidance of God and religion. I think that in order to really describe such an experiement and its undertakings, deeper and more exact descriptions need to be exposed rather than the vague and seemingly minor reflections that persisted throughout this draft.
---> What is life like without God?

Response to Laurens Healthy Wealthy and Tired

First of all, I would like to say that it was really easy to read this essay progressively and understand each point that she made because I, just like Lauren, sleep late and wake up late. I enjoyed reading about this experiment and of what she gained from undertaking it because I also always wondered what it'd be like to wake up so early and to run each of my errands five hours earlier on schedule each day. My favorite part of Laurens essay was the scene which took place in the Mojo dining hall at 7 AM when she ate breakfast, looking out the window at the rising sun and the start of a new day. This is something that a lot of college students are unable to witness or to ever experience, because of their complex late night tasks and unstable schedules. I would love to see a couple of more scenes which included more of her inner thoughts and feelings throughout the course of her experiment as she progressed through it.

Response to Breonna's "Statistically Breached"

Breonna, in writing her journey, brought us literally through a journey. We were allowed to know at what time, at what place, and at what circumstances she was performing or partaking in each action/event. I liked how Breonna inserted times for her readers to be more familiar with the happenstance, allowing us to gauge approximately how long each event lasted. When she brought up the fact that she was "statistically breached," I couldn't help but relate with her. Too often, I will plan to go somewhere but look up too much about it prior to actually going. By doing this, I as well as she is never able to fully understand, respect, or learn from that place that we happen to go to. Breonna's style of writing for this particular journey elicited high level representations of desolation, mystery and uncertainty. I like the repetitive inclusion of such representations because they were able to keep me interested in reading about her journey and finding out how it ended.

Response to Tara's "Grandir"

I really like the way that Tara started off her essay. She introduced the plot at the airport, right before boarding a plane. She was able to catch my attention right off the bat when she made it known that she was "anxious and scared" at the airport. I knew what was coming next. I think that Tara wrote this essay really well, with a well thought out structure which progressed from scene to scene, and story to story.
The journey showed a real, clear, and extraordinary transformation from wishing she were never there on the first day to wishing she were no where else by the last day. What I really liked about this journey was that it included the entire dramatic structure:
Exposition - at the airport, not wanting to go
Rising action - she begins to meet people that make her happier
Climax - having the time of her life on the trip
Falling action - trip coming to an end
Resolution - Realization that she is capable of being independent. Hence title "Grandir"

Response to Roni's "Natural Adaptation"

As a basketball player as well as a national basketball association fan, I found Roni's piece to be relaxing to read and reminiscent of my own memories of back when I used to attend NBA games. I remember it all too well, which allowed me to relate with Roni, the author of the piece. When I read about the part in which she was very hesitant to wear Laker colors to the Detroit game, I gave out a little chuckle because I knew exactly what type of feelings she was experiencing at the time. This is because when I was younger, I would drive from New York to New Jersey to watch my favorite teams play against the New Jersey Nets, who at the time were not a very popular NBA team. I felt the same exact way each time, even when I went to watch games at Madison Square Garden.

I found Roni's journey to be quite exciting. I felt that if she had described the ending to that very particular basketball game of which she attended, the essay would have gave out even more energy and excitement for her readers. With the two, very costly missed free throws by Steve Nash, one of the best free throw shooters in history, with only a few seconds on the clock left in the game even I was shocked when I viewed the game on television. The approach that Roni used to connect the feeling of being away from home but, actually, at "home" at the same time, was easily interpretable and smooth. I feel like her essay describing her journey was well-organized, progressive and overall, great!

Reflection on Victor's Daze

I found Victor's piece "Daze" to be extremely interesting to read. Whilst reading his essay, I felt as if I were with him on each of these days. The way in which he expressed himself through the words he used and the inner thoughts he exposed to readers allowed me to feel comfortable and close to him on an audience vs. author level. As an avid, daily MoJo dining hall go-er as well, I was able to relate with Victor in many of his scenarios. Victor was able to enrapture my attention throughout the entire piece because he did not stick to a single topic for lengthy periods of time. What I liked about "Daze" the most was that in just seven pages, he was able to compact a lot of his thoughts clearly and each page of his essay was embellished with a lot of detail, information, and substance. I believe that Victor's journey was original and contrary to the average journey that is so typically summarized by "i went to" and "i came back."

Creative Title: A Response to "Umbilicus"